By Susan Cramm, strategy + business
About a month ago, I was sitting on the patio of a
local coffee shop with a wonderful 14-year-old young lady who we’ll call
Alyssa. Full of love and life, she easily connects with others, is
compassionate with children, and is starting to demonstrate an artistic bent.
But when we met, she was feeling a bit depressed. I asked her to consider her
gifts and strengths, to help her refocus on the positive. But instead, she grew
quiet and looked at me blank faced, seemingly dumbstruck and unable to see what
is easily apparent to others.
My experience with Alyssa is not unique. Having spent
a fair amount of time volunteering with middle-school students, I’m saddened
that most really don’t know what makes them special. And on the eve of
International Women’s Day, I’m reminded that it’s up to those of us who have
achieved success to mentor and encourage the young women who are following in
our footsteps.
This blog post is in honor of two women who have
dedicated their lives to helping children transform into young adults. In
particular, they made a profound impact on the life of a 13-year-old girl named
Sarah, who shares her story:
My name is Sarah and I’m in seventh grade. Almost all
my life I knew that I liked to draw and sing, but I never thought about
writing. That is, until fifth grade when my English teacher, Mrs. Greene, and
the principal, Mrs. McKinney, saw something in me that I didn’t see in myself.
In English class, I wrote a story about a pup-eating
panther that raised an abandoned wolf. Although I worked hard, I didn’t think
much of my story. But my teacher did. She read it to my class and told me that
the principal wanted me to read my story to her! After I did, the principal and
I had a conversation that I will always remember. She asked me what I wanted to
be. I replied that I hoped to be an artist, because drawing was a passion of
mine and the only thing I really got compliments on. She recommended that I
consider being a writer—an idea that hadn’t even entered my 11-year-old brain!
I was sure that my success had just been a fluke,
until I entered two writing contests the following year and was recognized in
both. The first one had an assortment of winners, and from that I won a pair of
sandals. But the second one, and this really blew my mind, only picked one
person from each grade level to win throughout Orange County, Calif. I won $50!
It was amazing! I was very pleased with myself.
Now I have my sights set on being an author and an
illustrator. Writing is something I truly enjoy. I love how you get a special
idea in your head, and then it flows out like the sweetest of honey, out on the
page. Then you get more and more ideas, and it becomes a new building of
metaphors, synonyms, similes, etc.—like an architectural design of literature.
I know that not everyone will like my literary architecture. And, even though I
shouldn’t care what other people say about me, I do, and hope I will be
successful. I realize I will have to work hard and save my money to go to
college to make my dreams a reality. And, most likely, I’ll need to have
another job, just in case.
But I am excited about the choice I have made for my
life and really glad that I get to choose, unlike many women before me.
I am nothing but grateful to those brave women who
stood up for what was right and sacrificed themselves to make it possible for
me to be where I am today, and I salute the brave women and girls around the
world who are fighting for the same education and rights that we sometimes take
for granted. It is amazing to think what a girl can do when she sets goals.
When I die, I hope that I will be remembered. I want a legacy that says that I
was actually worth something and not just a quiet girl who sat in the corner
desk.
Sarah’s story is a sweet, poignant example of how
small moments of intentional encouragement can have large, reverberating
impact. The best encouragers look for growth, not perfection. They don’t tell
people what to do, but help them reflect on who they are and the implications
of their actions. They don’t express concern, but convey confidence. And
finally, they lift others up—giving more encouragement than they get.
Consider your family, workplace, and community. How
can you encourage others to recognize, develop, and use their gifts?
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